Fear can be a powerful nemesis. It lies there silently in waiting until just the right moment and then simply whispers in your ear that there is too much risk, you aren’t ready, or you aren’t good enough. Fear has this clever way of making us feel like we have no control, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth.
Fear, my friends, is a coward. In a standoff, fear will always back down, and we can use that to our advantage.
You see, fear creates something inside of us called a ‘Limiting Belief’. This is that little voice inside of us that keeps saying we can’t do something; that we lack the skills, knowledge, capability, or whatever else we need, to be successful at something. This is the voice that keeps us in spaces and situations that are too small for what we really need, and denies our need and ability to move to a bigger place that allows us to grow and thrive. This limiting belief is just that, limiting.
When it comes to having visual conversations, you might be telling yourself something like this:
- “It is not going to turn out the way I want it to”
- “I feel so self-conscious standing up there drawing”
- “Someone is going to criticize me. I am going to get it wrong.”
- “I can’t do this, I am (fill in the blank)”
These may all sound pretty reasonable, but don’t let them fool you, none of them are true. And if you look deep within yourself, you may realize that you know this, too. You may simply forget this every once in a while.
Here, then, are some of the ways I help myself remember.
Four (and a half) ways you can kick your fear and limiting beliefs right in the butt:
1. Befriend Your inner Critic. Our inner critic can come in all shapes and sizes. Maybe your inner critic is the Perfectionist who simply never things anything is good enough, or maybe your inner critic is the Good Girl who is always trying really hard to please everyone. No matter what your inner critic looks like, trying to simply ignore it won’t help. It is only when you begin to acknowledge your inner critic and recognize why it is showing up, that you will be able to learn how to move forward and realize your inner critic doesn’t know everything.
2. Give Yourself Permission. That’s right, you have to give yourself permission. I am always surprised at how powerful this idea can be. When we give ourselves permission, it lifts this weight off of us that allows us to move forward without the fear of failure. When we have permission, it’s all systems go. Make sure you are consciously giving yourself permission to pick up that pen and start drawing. Sometimes it’s helpful to even draw up a “permission to play” slip for yourself as a reminder that it REALLY IS okay for you to pick up the pen and have some fun! (I did this when I was first starting out as a graphic facilitator. Now this permission is simply a part of me!)
3. Take Imperfect Action. Stop worrying about well you draw; that really doesn’t matter. You just have to start drawing. You heard me, you just have to START! The longer you wait to start the more you are letting that inner critic build up fear inside you. Tip your hat to your inner critic, kick that fear in the butt, pick up that pen, and take imperfect action. You will thank me later.
4. Be Good Enough. All you need are two things: persistence and confidence. If you are taking imperfect action, then you are already on your way. And if you continually take action and pick up that pen, then the confidence will soon follow. The more you draw the more you will see that everything you do is good enough.
And, if you REALLY want to grind this in for yourself:
4.5 Wear your boots. When I put on my cowboy boots, I’m not just putting on shoes: I’m reinforcing a mindset. Reinforce YOUR butt-kicking mindset by creating a talisman or symbol for yourself that reminds you that you are bigger and greater than the flimsy fearful thoughts inside your head. Wear a pair of kickin’ boots, wear a charm to remind you on your bracelet, carry something to remind you in your pocket, or even use a photo of the thing as wallpaper for your computer or smartphone. (Here’s mine!) The more you ground yourself in your butt-kicking mindset, the easier it becomes to move through your fears to what you want.
No Buts
What all this really comes down to is realizing that we can accomplish anything we want. No matter what your inner critic might say, or how fear might make you feel, we all have amazing potential. When you begin to put these 4.5 ideas into practice you will quickly see that you already have the skills you need to start taking action. So pick up that pen, confidently walk into that room for that next conversation, and draw your little heart out. Not only will you begin to make a powerful impact on those around you, but your inner critic won’t be able to help themselves from giving you a huge high five!
I cannot wait to see what you draw forth,
