An Imperfect Runner

“So how long did it take you?”
 
My boyfriend’s father, Jim, squinted up at me from under his floppy hat as I jaunted over to him in the back yard. He had been working on the back deck, and I had just run my first ever 10K–a “challenging” trek over and under mountains, complete with sherpas. (Okay, not really, but it could have been.)
 
“One hour and thirty minutes,” I proudly said with a smile.
 
Jim struggled to his feet, looking confused. “How long of a run was it?”
 
“A 10K mountain trail run. And I’m happy with that time, Jim.”
 
“Oh. Okay. Let me show you what I’ve been doing on the deck… “
 
– – – – –
 
What I didn’t tell Jim was that I came in dead last in that run. And I mean DEAD last. As in, a-trail-guide-took-my-picture-to-prove-that-I-was-alive-when-she-found-me last. After his reaction to my time, I thought it prudent to omit that small detail. So now you know: I’m a slow runner.
 
But guess what? I AM a runner. I LOVE running. It was always hard for me to get myself to the gym, but just try to stop me from getting my training in! I simply love the rhythm I fall into when my feet hit the pavement. I love the feeling of each step slowly sifting things out of my head and stress out of my body. It’s a moving meditation for me–not about running at any particular speed, but just to be in my body covering the distance and being present for it all.
 
Jim ran a marathon in his 40’s. He ran it at (I think) a 7 minute mile pace. I’m 39, training for the Disneyland half-marathon (my first!) in September, and I will be thrilled to run it at a 10 minute mile pace. I won’t be first to cross the finish line, but I won’t be last either. I’ll get to experience the run, enjoy the process, maybe have my picture taken with a character or two, and cheer on the rest of the participants once I’ve crossed my own finish line… with a big smile on my face!
 
And this is where Jim and I differ about running. He sees running as a competition against others; I see running as a collaboration with myself and the moment. And by doing this, I will win that race every time regardless of my pace!

I cannot wait to see what you draw forth,

About Jeannel

- INFJ - Strategic | Activator | Connectedness | Relator | Intellection - Scorpio - Cat Person - Movie Buff - Modern-Day Johnny Appleseed - Creative who Specializes in Organizational Culture Change - Painfully Aware of Her White Privilege

2 Comments

  1. Great post! Whenever I run I have to keep repeating to myself, “Run your own race!” This post is very timely for me because on the 4th of July I am going to run my first 10K IN TWENTY-FIVE YEARS! (I ran 7 minute miles twenty-five years and thirty-five pounds ago…will be ECSTATIC if I break 10 minute miles now!)

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